Article Dan speed blogs

Yes. You read that title right: Mega Shark vs Giant Octopus. A real movie. And no, your eyes do not deceive you, the movie features - Deborah 'Debbie' Gibson.

If you're asking 'Debbie WHO?' then you are wayyyy too young and I resent your youth and the innocence that comes with it. And you're too young to watch what follows. Go to bed, you fucker.



But c'mon - more than Snakes on a Plane - THIS LOOKS AWESOME! The shark, people - the shark jumps out of the ocean and attacks a jumbo jet! If that doesn't warrant the cost of a movie ticket... Well, I'm... Hell, I may as well just come right out and say it: This movie will single-handedly (plus eight tentacledly) SAVE THE MOVIE INDUSTRY.

There, I said it.

Piracy will be crushed under the weight of box office demand. Debbie Gibson will have her star on Hollywood Boulevard. The Asylum will receive the Nobel Prize for Cinema. The world will be a better place.

A place where music and good times can once again rule. Like they did in 1988. Like they did when Debbie was doing her thing:



Keep th' faith and th' receipt,

Article Dan

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Today's the day Watchmen gets its general cinema release. The greatest comic book of all time. On film. Oh dear.

And yet, for all the doubts and previous celluloid horrors committed in Alan Moore's name (From Hell, League of Extraodinary Gentlemen, V for Vendetta - every one a Rorschach blot on Hollywood's copy book), this film actually looks pretty goddamn promising.



But surely nothing Zack Snyder can deliver will be a patch on this:



Keep th' faith,
Article Dan

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Now here's a curious little nugget: conspiracy freak, activist, political polemic-producing Oliver Stone has a new film approaching:

W - the George W Bush Story

Set for release around the time of the real-life departure from High Office of its titular 'hero', I can't help but feel that, while that makes sense from a marketing perspective, it may be jumping the gun a little. I mean, it ain't over 'til it's over…

Sure there's little likelihood of a big hoo-hah in the twilight of his disasterous administration, but you never know. Imagine if they'd done a biopic of JFK focusing on all the Mafia suspicions, the fillandering, the Cuban Missile Crisis, set for release on 12 November 1963… As biopics go it would have felt like there was a little something missing.

NB - this post is not part of plot to assassinate W, so please don't start surveiling the shit out of me.

Crap. Just by typing that I'm probably even HIGHER on the CIA alerts lists. And now I've typed CIA Alerts… Twice!

Arse.

Still - means the ol' blog's seeing SOME kind of traffic, I guess. Big love to my fans in Homeland Security :o)

(Really, really just asking for trouble…)

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